you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
