If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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