I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
