oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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