my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
