Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
