The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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