I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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