I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize
