Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
