I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
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