Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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