We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
