Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
