yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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