did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
