There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Terrible idea I love it
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
