I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
