her vagine was all disorganized.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
