the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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