I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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