I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize