haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
