Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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