I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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