Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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