You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
You are the jesus of drinking
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
