He kissed a someone with a penis
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
