She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
