"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
