My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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