you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
