Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
