I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
