guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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