hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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