i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
