their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Randomize
