i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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