dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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