just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
