I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
