you turned your livingroom into a bong?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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