John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I believe in your delicious
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize