You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
you never un-have a 4some
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
