woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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