Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
