Kiss
Puke
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize