Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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