I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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