I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
What changed your mind?
Being sober
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
